Preparing Home-made meals as ordinary, but for this Christmas Eve, I made almost unlimited numbers of Sushi Rolls. Played a bit of Card-Game Together. Watched a comedy show while Leona playing Minecraft on Tablet & me stitching. 99% of the Stories here are about Sashiko & myself in Japan. I have another 99% of the ordinary here that I appreciate so much. I sometimes feel bad that I cannot take my family on a “vacation”. We don’t have to worry about tomorrow’s bread (thanks to my spouse), yet spending nights in Hotels & doing winter activities easily unbalances the ordinary. I am not complaining as it can get a lot worse – and I have been through… Holidays are an important time to appreciate the family, yet time to see neighbors’ greener grass.
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That being said, it is not my plan to hand “this” to my daughter. She sees me stitching all the time, yet I never force her to stitch. If she asks me to teach her, I gladly will. If she decides to pursue Sashiko as a career, I will oppose it first, then set one condition – to be somewhat proficient in Japanese, yet I will continue to question her if it is really what she wants.
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As a parent, I do not want her to go through the same difficulties I go/went through. It is so sad to realize that the life-long practice cannot support one’s life. I cannot even make my end meet by just doing “Sashiko”. I know the time people made a living by doing Sashiko. In decades of change, I blamed myself for not working hard enough. My father did the same. We thought we lost because of lack of hard-work. After learning Sashiko in English, I realize it isn’t true. I learn that there is a case where one works so hard in important work, yet is “unknown” because of lack of “acknowledgement”. Therefore, I focus on “Stories” rather than “technique”. I want her to know the stories of where her upstream is.
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「娘さんには刺し子を継いでほしい？」と聞かれることがあります。答えは残念ながら「NO」で、私と同じ思いをして欲しくないからです。娘の前で刺し子はしているし、聞かれれば教えるけれど、本気で継ぎたいと言い出したら「まずは日本語やれ。んで日本に住め。」という「日本力」が最低ライン。自分の誇りに思う仕事でご飯が食べられなくなることは、本当に苦しいことです。昔は努力が足らないのだと自分を責めました。英語圏に移住した今は違います。「無視」する人の存在は誇りすら壊します。刺し子は残したく、また残るでしょう。ただ、乱暴な文化の塗り替えは心を抉られるキツさがあるのです。
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#Sashiko #刺し子
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